When You Find Worms in Your Toilet and other Office Water Cooler Chit Chat.

I couldn't think of any other good titles for this post.  I mean, I kinda wanted to get right to the point. Why "beat around the bush," right?

It's been kind of hard for me to deal with this new "diagnosis."  Okay, let's set the stage.  You walk into your office and are getting settled for another day at your job.  Your colleague walks in and you start chatting about the weather.  Then they ask you how your weekend was.  "Oh, you know, I went to a birthday party, finished painting the bathroom, and oh yeah, I started this parasite protocol to kill the tape worms that I have, then I started seeing them in my poop."

Being diagnosed with parasites is pretty icky.  My close friends and family already are medically challenged with my other diagnoses.  First there was Hashimotos, "isn't that when you have a big goiter, I think my grandma had that and took lots of salt?"  Then there was SIBO, "C-Bow? Oh, I've never even heard of that, is it like IBS, maybe you should get tested for an ulcer?"  Then there was "heavy metal toxicity."  "Oh, you should cut down on eating tuna!"  Recently there's been the newer one of lyme disease.  "When did you get bit by a tick?"  And now parasites?  Bly me....

Infertility has already been a pretty shameful diagnosis.  That was the first diagnosis that I carried like baggage behind me for quite some time.  The other diagnoses have made their debut one at a time, slowly adding to the weight of my luggage. Parasites was the final piece of baggage, which I hope will finally be the straw that breaks the camel's back. How do you politely discuss your diagnosis of parasites over lunch with a friend?  Or while they're making dinner during a phone conversation.  You just don't, cause it's freakin' gross.

When I received this last Parasite diagnosis, I didn't really believe it. I mean, it sort of made sense to me, but I couldn't really process it.  This is not your average diagnosis like diabetes or a herniated disc.  I started a Parasite Protocol, because why the hell not?  I had nothing else to lose.

Brene Brown discusses shame in this infamous Ted Talk.  Shame in itself may be the parasite that is eating me alive.  Dragged behind me these past years have been suitcases labeled with their differing diagnoses, but inside they are filled to the brim with shame.  The last suitcase with the ugly label of "Parasite" is just another box overfilled with vulnerability.

I may not be able, at the moment, to talk to my friends and colleagues about my boxes of shame, but I can open up to those that need to read about it.  Those that are disheartened by their current medical diagnoses, feel shame toward their own diagnoses, or looking for the diagnosis that makes most sense to them.   I have been perusing the world wide web and have found some solace in others' journeys with parasites.  Hopefully, I can bring my own love and insight to those looking for guidance, helping others release their own packages of shame.

In future posts, I will hope to share my progress.